Ugh, it’s Monday again, I hate Mondays.  The weekend was fun though. Friday evening I went to my sister’s house and she highlighed my hair.  It didn’t turn out too bad.  Then I came home and hung out with Chad and Kaden for a while and then met up with Kyle to watch Totoro but we ended up not watching it that night.  We went to his friend’s house who was verrrrrry drunk so I walk in the front door and the first thing he does is bend over and moon me. So I saw more than enough ass and balls that night haha. Then we went over to Kyle’s other friend’s apartment and played guitar hero.  It was my second time playing so I sucked. Oh well.  Saturday…I don’t really remember.. oh yeah! Saturday night we had Mom watch Kaden and we went to the Christmas party tweetup.  Met lots of new people and it was fun.  I had this really good peach beer that was in a wine looking bottle with a cork.  If I had to imagine eating popuri, that’s what this tasted like haha. It was good though.  I drank a lil too much haha.  Sunday we slept in and then I went shopping with my sister.  Then came home and chilled with Chad and Kaden some more.  Then met up with Kyle again to try to watch Totoro.  We ended up at his friend’s house that showed me his balls again.  They had other movies to watch so we watched Bad Santa, then we tried to watch Totoro but I told them they wouldn’t like it, and they didn’t haha. So we made it through maybe half before it got turned off and they put in Fight Club. I had never seen it before, nor do I ever want to see it again.  Two and a half movies in one night was a bit of an overload considering how I don’t care to watch movies. Oh well.  I wasn’t paying attention half the time or me and Kyle we talking about something really retarded cuz we had be taking shots of vodka haha.  It’s cool though.  I still have to make Kyle watch National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation cuz he’s never seen it and that’s just un-American. It’s a funny movie!  But yeah, that’s about how my weekend went.  Now it’s stupid Monday and I am not happy about this at all.  But so far today I’ve done the dishes, started the laundry and cleaned the kitchen a bit.  I got both of Chad’s presents I ordered in the mail.  He has already guessed what one of them is. Grrr.  Oh well.  We still have to finish the rest of our shopping.  We went to the mall saturday which was a big mistake.  Ok, I don’t wanna type anymore…

We put the Christmas decorations up the other day.  We put the stockings up last year but this is our first year to put up a tree.  It’s just an old tree my mom had around her house so it’s nothing fancy.  Actually, it’s kind of crappy.  If you look at it closely you can see inside the middle of the tree and tell that it is very fake. Oh well.

I went to the IBR Plasma Center Saturday with Kyle to try to donate plasma again. You have to weigh at least 110 to donate so I had been eating a ton to try to weigh enough.  So we got there and I was only 108.6 pounds so I didn’t get to.  They told me to come back if I gain a few pounds.  But I don’t see that happening any time soon.  I’m already back down to almost 100 again somehow.  No good.  So I guess I’ll never get to have my own money.   I had big plans for the money that would be mine.  So since dad went with me to ZLB Plasma Center the first time, he got it into his head that we must be really poor and starving to death since I want to donate plasma for money.  He was like, “I can loan you some money if you need it, you don’t need to do this.”  I told him I don’t know how many times that we’re fine and I just wanted a lil extra money of my own. So I get a phone call from my grandma today asking if we were ok and if I needed money.  I was like, “no, we’re fine.” And kept asking, “are you sure? I can take you grocery shopping, does Kaden have enough food?”   What is it with people thinking we’re on the verge of starvation just because I wanted to donate plasma?! I just wanted to, ok! Damn.

I stumbled upon Kaboodle.com the other day and thought it was a pretty cool site.  It just pretty much a universal wish list so you can ad anything to it from any site.  I was pretty excited about it so I made one.  I’ve never really made a wish list before.  I put stuff for Chad and Kaden on it too.  People are always asking what we want for Christmas and I’m just always like, “I dunnooooo.”  Sooo, now I can just say to look at the wish list.  Although no one really buys things online… oh well I guess.  I still thought it was neat.

You can see it here.

ZLB Plasma Center royally pissed me off today.  First off I gain an uncomfortable amount of weight just so I can go.  I get there and they tell me I need a piece of mail or something else with my address on it since it’s not the same on my drivers license.  So I was like ok. I go home and get one and go back.  I check in and sit there for about 30 minutes before they tell me I have to leave because they don’t allow children.  Nowhere is that posted or anything.  I’m like, you could have F-ing told me this THE FIRST DAMN TIME I WAS HERE!  But no, I wasted my gas and my time, hooray.  So, I do NOT plan on everrrr going back to that place cuz they made me pretty mad.  Plus I here IBR Plasma Center on Hillside is nicer.  They don’t allow kids either though so I’d have to have mom watch Kaden sometime or something.  Chad is being a retard and doesn’t want me to donate plasma cuz he’s stingy.  But I want to. So Ima do it. Take that.  I was considering giving bone marrow but he is stingy with that too.  It’s a more complex procedure so I don’t know that I’ll have time to do somethin like that.

Not much else has gone on.  We were gonna go to Furr’s Sunday cuz their menu online said they had turkey that day.  So we were almost there and I got this funny feeling that they weren’t going to have turkey. So I called and asked and she said no.  But we were practically there so we just went in and checked cuz the people that answer the phone are almost never right.  But no, they didn’t have it. So we left.  I called Bishop’s and asked if they had turkey and the foreign lady was all like “oh, yeah! We have turkey!”  But I kneeew, I knew, I would be greatly disappointed when I got there. And I was.  Surprise, no turkey! You see, this is not the first time this has happend. So we spent almost $20 on a very disappointing meal.     Oh well I guess.

Well, today is, or was, Kaden’s first Thanksgiving.  We went out to Arlington for lunch but were late.  I took cheesy corn and 2 pies.  The food was yummy.  Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday just for that reason.  I, of course, ate way too much and put on waaay too many pounds.  So I won’t be eating for the next week or so.  We got back to town around 6 I think and Chad made some Chili and we’ve done absolutely nothing since then.  Chad is watching some retarded movie now and is pissed that I don’t want to watch a movie.  Movies are pretty much a waste of time to me, I just don’t like them.

I had planned on going out shopping tomorrow, like I do almost every year, or at least I used to.  But surprise, no money!    So I’m pretty disappointed.  I’ll be staying home doing nothing at all while the rest of the world is out getting great bargains.  Boo.  Lunch at my favorite buffet was offered for tomorrow but I doubt that will happen either.    Might as well just sleep all day.  At least dreaming might be a little bit fun or exciting.  But with my luck I probably wouldn’t have any dreams at all.  Ugh, foul mood.

I want to go out and do something tonight.  But there’s not much open and no one to go with.  That and the fact that I have no money and since I didn’t want to watch a movie with chad, I’m not allowed to go anywhere.  I guess I’m grounded? *sigh*  So I kinda just wanna go to bed now but Chad’s in there watching a movie and I have to give Kaden a bath at some point tonight.  Blah. I’ll just end this grouchy post now.

I decided I needed to post again but realized that I have nothing to post about. Not a lot has gone on. I cut my own hair again.  It looks pretty much like it did the last time I cut it.  No two pieces are the same length, but hey.  Oh well.  Chad had to go back to Chicago yesterday after he got off work.  He gets back sometime tonight.  Mom stayed here and watched Kaden and I went over to a friends house and ended up stayin and pullin an all-nighter.  Mom had to be to work early this morning so I got come around 7 this morning and fed Kaden breakfast.  I got to bed around 8 or 8:30 and slept til noon.  That’s all the sleep I’ve had so I’m a lil sleepy.  I’ve had slightly less sleep than usual haha.  Everyone was all worried I wouldn’t be able to function, thanks for doubting me.  I can manage just fine without 12+ hours of sleep if I want to. I can. o_O

Chad and I went to our first actual Tweetup last week at Buffalo Wild Wings.  It was fun and my wings were yummy.  Drinks we not so yummy.  I’m horrible at ordering drinks cuz I don’t know what anything is.  Boo.  We went to Town And Country restaurant too and I ordered a strawberry daquiri, mmmm.  That still has to be one of my favorite drinks.    OH! and while we were there I was brutally attacked and violated by a spider on my FACE.  I, of course, start flipping out.  I flung the spider somewhere but not sure where, never saw it again.  It was no good.

My sister must have been really bored Saturday night cuz she actually wanted to do something with me.  So we went to Buffalo Wild Wings again and then went to Side Pockets.  Ryan was there and I watched them play pool cuz I look absolutely retarded trying to play.  I mean like, totally missing the balls and whatnot.  It’s that bad.  So I just chilled and drank my “Dirty Bong Water.” Haha.  I still don’t know what’s in that drink either, but it’s yummy.

I got a memory card for my phone today, so now I can actually put music on it, yay! Well, I could except for the stupid card reader thing in the computer isn’t working again.  It does this on occasion.  So I have to wait for Chad to get home and “surgery” the computer to fix it again.  Dumb.

Uh, I think that’s it.  Plus I’m getting bored with this.

So in my last post I mentioned my phobias.  I was bored so I actually made a list of them haha. I have more than I though. Ugh, oh well I guess.  I told you I had a lot haha.

• Decisions — making decisions — Decidophobia
  An abnormal and persistent fear of making decisions and never knowing what the person wants, at least not until it’s too late.
• Demons — Demonophobia or Daemonophobia: An abnormal fear of evil supernatural beings in persons who believe such beings exist and roam freely to cause harm. Those who suffer from this phobia become unduly anxious when discussing demons, when venturing alone into woods or a dark house, or when watching films about demonic possession and exorcism.Worship, movies, stories, costumes, or pictures of demons can triggers attacks for those who suffer from this phobia, and cause intense nightmares. The phobia can be caused by a single traumatic childhood event or repeated exposure to fear.
• Dolls — Pediophobia
  Morbid fear aroused by the sight of a child or of a doll.
• Opinions — Allodoxaphobia
  A fear of other people’s opinions.
• Ugliness — Cacophobia
  An uncommon fear of ugliness.
  Ventriloquist’s dummy — Automatonophobia
  Fear of ventriloquist’s dummies, animatronic creatures, or wax statues. For some odd reason, this phobia seems well justified.
• Witches and Witchcraft — Wiccaphobia
  An abnormal and persistent fear of witches and witchcraft.
• Work — Ergophobia or PonophobiaWhile many may joke about this, it’s a bonified phobia — rejection of the work environment, the act of performing duties or having to be part of a team going towards a common goal. Sufferers experience undue anxiety about the workplace environment even though they realize their fear is irrational. Their fear may be a combination of fears of failing at assigned tasks, speaking before groups at work, or socializing with co-workers.
• Darkness — Achluophobia – Fear of darkness.
• People — Anthropophobia – Fear of people or society.
• Spiders — Arachnophobia – Fear of spiders.
• Imperfection — Atelophobia – Fear of imperfection.
• Failure — Atychiphobia – Fear of failure.
• Loneliness — Autophobia – Fear of being alone.
• Floods — Antlophobia- Fear of floods.
• Being ridiculed — Catagelophobia – Fear of being ridiculed.
• Cemeteries — Coimetrophobia- Fear of cemeteries.
• Confined spaces — Claustrophobia – Fear of confined spaces.
• Clowns — Coulrophobia – Fear of clowns.
• Dentists — Dentophobia – Fear of dentists.
• Accidents — Dystychiphobia – Fear of accidents.
• Expressing opinions — Doxophobia- Fear of expressing opinions or of receiving praise.
• Deformity — Dysmorphophobia- Fear of deformity
• Crowds — Enochlophobia or Ochlophobia – Fear of crowds.
• Public speaking — Glossophobia – Fear of speaking in public.
• Being nekked — Gymnophobia – Fear of Nudity
• Bums — Hobophobia – Fear of bums or beggars.
• Large bodies of water — Hydrophobia – Fear of water.
• Bugs — Insectophobia – Fear of insects.
• Loud noises — Ligyrophobia – Fear of loud noises.
• Tornadoes — Lilapsophobia – Fear of tornadoes and hurricanes.
• Lakes — Limnophobia – Fear of lakes.
• Dead things — Necrophobia – Fear of death or dead things.
• Being fat — Obesophobia – Fear of gaining weight.
• ??? — Fear of boats
• ??? — Fear of making phone calls
• ??? — Fear of making mistakes
• ??? — Fear of looking stupid
• ??? — Fear that people are always watching me
• ??? — Fear of rejection
• ??? — Fear of making people unhappy
• ??? — Fear of whispering-they must be talking about me, right?

I’ve recently come to terms with how much I do not like myself.  I tried to think of the things I do like about myself and the list was way short.  There just really isn’t much I am happy with about myself.  So I compiled a list of things I don’t like about myself. Why?  I don’t know.  Maybe I’ll work on them and check them off as they get better but prolly not.

• My hair
• My eye color
• My pointy top lip
• My chins
• My teeth
• My body shape
• My round, fat stomach
• My “love handles”
• The shape of my legs
• The size of my feet
• My complexion
• My pointy nose
• My boobs
• My butt
• My gray hair
• My not tann-ness
• My voice
• My OCD
• All my needless phobias
• My dumbness
• My indecisiveness
• My mind
• My thoughts
• My insecurity
• Being overly self conscience about all the above

Yesterday was my 21st birthday!! Hooray!! I didn’t do much.  Sat at home with Kaden until Chad got home from work like usual.  Then we had planned on going to Baxter’s Cafe for dinner, but they were closed.  So we drove around trying to decide what I wanted to eat.  We decided on La Chinita’s.  We pulled into their parking lot and I decided I didn’t feel like Mexican food haha.  So we sat there for a bit and decided on TGIFriday’s. So we headed that way.  On the way there I decided I didn’t want that and I wanted to try Jerry’s Bar and Grill instead.  We always drive by it and I had wanted to go there. So that’s where we finally ended up going.  I had expected it to be more restaurant like but it was a full blown bar with stinky cigarette smell and all.  Good thing Kaden was with Mom.  Their food was good though.  I got the chicken strip dinner with green beans and mashed potatoes and gravy, mmmm.  Chad got a burger and fries and wasn’t real impressed.  But mine was good.  He got a tall Amber Bock that they had on tap and it was huge! They only charged us 2 somethin for it too.  So their drinks are reasonably priced.  I had no idea what kind of drink to order so I just told the waitress something fruity haha.  She brought me something called “Clean Pussy.” haha.  I have no idea what was in it but it was bright blue and it was yummy. Mmmm, clean pussy.  Tuesdays and Thursdays are 2-4-1 nights so I got two, yay!  It was my first time ever ordering a drink and I didn’t even get carded.  Boo. But I was satisfied with my birthday dinner and drinks.

After dinner we came home and went pee.  Not entirely sure why.  But then we went to the mall real quick so I could try on a pair of DC shoes.  I found a pair I like online but had no idea what size I needed so I tried some on at Journey’s.  I normally hate going in that store cuz I always feel really awkward for some reason.  But they guy that helped me was pretty cool.  He had these big, thick framed black glasses on but you could totally tell there was no glass in them haha.  Cool I guess?  I dunno.  So after that we went to the liquor store to pick up a case of beer and supplies for Jell-o shots.  I have decided it’s probably best that I don’t go alcohol shopping alone.  I would pick out the things with the coolest looking bottles…which are of course not cheap.  They’re tricky like that.  But at least I got carded there, hooray. 

So I have a ton of cleaning to do before tomorrow night and time is running out.  We’re going to Arlington tomorrow afternoon to pick up some firewood.  So I wont get any cleaning done then.  I was supposed to go get it with Dad today but he had a migraine this morning so I called Grandma and told her we weren’t coming today.  So then an hour later Dad calls and says he’s better now and we could go if I wanted.  But I already told them we weren’t so he took me out to lunch at La Mesa for my birthday since he didn’t remember my birthday until today and he “felt like a fool.” Haha.

Well I have a lot to do so I need to stop writing this.  We’re gonna have beer pong downstairs tomorrow for the party but I realized our table is a little short for beer pong.  So we may play with tiny cups for a challenge haha.  I’d rather play Jell-o shot pong anyways. :-p

Okay, if you know me at all you know I am HORRIBLE at making up my mind. SO, I need help deciding what to wear to my friends 21st birthday/costume party on Friday.  I can be a pregnant me using a bag of plastic bags under my shirt, only problem with that is I crackle when I move haha.  My other option is to be a school girl thing.  For that I have no idea what to wear cuz I have 2 shirts I can’t decide between and 3 pairs or shoes that I can’t pick which one either! Ah!  Sooooo, what I need you to do is look at the pics and comment and tell me which looks best, white shirt or black shirt, the flats, the mary-janes or the tall shoes.  K, thanks!! Ready set go!